"talking to" received! Self inflicted. Highly recommend!

Okay Suzie! Whining pretty huge there. So...it's been several hours. And enough time to give myself a good talking to! It helped to get away from the contemporary christian music channels that sometimes don't help. Too much of a soundtrack and a chorus. I want the old hymns and the christian songs from the 80's which told a story...not just a chorus. Or that put the psalms and bible verses to music like Maranatha. Soothing. Speaking. Slooooowly...less fast, slower tempo. Gives you time to think, not just react. I even found another christian station, 89.1 lately that I like cause it has sermons! Not just songs. And solid sermons...good ones! So...after pretty much 11 hours, I and am out of the whine and woe stage. Back to actually recognizing and enjoying that I have blessings. So,so many. 
Now I don't fault myself for whining. It's a reality...trials are hard. tribulations even harder. (Don't ask me the exact difference either :). I am fully and humanly entitled to be angry, sad and cry as I find myself stepping and getting lost inside potholes that are strategically placed along the path we journey on. And I just went swimming in mine. But I hate to stay in any pothole.
This talking to...is pretty easy because my trial, my woes...so tiny compared to what I could be enduring. And what others are enduring! I just have to look around.
Right after Mike died and during the weeks before when he was having his chemo treatments, it was so evident to me and to the girls how people simply do not know what the person next to you is going through. The person in line at the grocery store, at the bank, at the post office or the driver of the car in the lane next to yours. We have NO idea! Be kind. Be gracious in giving others grace when they yell at you or are abrupt or curt...or even rude. Hold back your angry comment and try to let the ugly thought slide away from you. Don't let it stick or be spoken. Because ...truly...you just DON'T know. Maybe they're really in a joyous chapter. Be happy for them. Let happiness override covetousness or resentment and take joining in being happy for others good fortunes as a gift. Or maybe what they are in is a chapter that is horribly, and painfully awful. Like ones I've experienced. Or am experiencing..as "wham" moments etc. Or worse. Or better. The thing is...you really just do not know what the person smiling at you in line or in a parking lot as they head for their car is really...going through. And if I think of all the possibilities there are that they could be dealing with...my own troubles and grief and issues shrank down into a perspective that left me gratefully thanking God for what I have.
Yep, you grab hold of your bootstraps, hike yourself onto a rock and look at your pothole. Then at all the others that exist in the world that you could be in...and that others are in! Good talk self!
Now I have to realize that my earlier entry is even a bit embarrassing. Oh...Woe woe is me. Complaining about having to handle all these rentals when others have no home at all and lie in the woods with dirt for a pillow. I have down....fluffy fluffy down alternative and down (no feathers!) pillows and a tempurpedic!  
I sang my apologies to the Lord and (yep, I write songs in my head as I sing them...but they never get written down on paper. Sometimes rhyming. Sometimes not. Sometimes very clever and lyrical and I think...this should be published! But my songwriting/singing is just to the Lord so my prayer songs are "one and done" songs :).  
Anyhooooo. I have had time to reflect (eg: sing). about all my myriad blessings. Getting to see Mike again. Having HAD a husband as good as he was to me. My girls. And...all the blessings I have Material-wise and Friend and Family-wise. Yep...talked to. Feeling good again.  
Next time...I will do what I usually do...which is NOT to get on my blog and spill my emotions because...as it is again and again since Mike died and Mom died and Dad died and the miscarriage happened and sickness happened and finances dropped and...oh yeah. I guess this is what is called "life" happening :)....after a pep talk and reflection on blessings and the Lord Himself...I always climb out of the pothole, onto the rock of my salvation. And clouds part and beautiful vistas start to be seen. So...onward I go. Till the next storm...or pothole.